السَّلاَمُ عَلَيْكُمْ وَرَحْمَةُ اللهِ وَبَرَكَاتُهُ
It’s Sunday 29th November 2020.
Let’s continue with ‘Marital Issues‘ today, اِنْ شَاءَ الَّلهُ. (Link to Part 1)
Once a couple are married, they enjoy each other’s company and spend many happy moments together. One of the happiest moments of married life is when Almighty Allāh bestows the couple with a child. What a sweet occasion. The happiness of the father and especially the mother is beyond explanation. A beautiful innocent little baby is now the focus of the couple.
Families from both sides, friends and colleagues are all part of the happiness. Almighty Allāh blesses some couples with so many children. Some may have only boys, some only girls, some both.
Each and every marriage has its ups and downs. No marriage is without its problems. However, when you have been blessed with children, you must both act responsibly as adults and show your maturity at all times. There must be no bad language or arguments in front of the children. Swearing and physical violence is out of the question. What wrong have your innocent little ones done to witness such incidents and scenes? Think for a moment.
Your child woke up at 7am and spent 7 hard hours in school, then another 2 even harder hours at Madrasah. After 7pm everyone is at home. Can you imagine what goes through your child’s mind when they see mum and dad arguing or fighting? If need be, discuss issues in your childrens’ absence, and try to maintain an air of normalcy in their presence.
If your marriage is on the rocks and you don’t want to stay together anymore, spare a thought for your innocent children. What have they done wrong to deserve this? Please forgive my tone, but it is very selfish of couples who have had their fun and enjoyment now wanting to separate, and let their children struggle for life.
Think hard about separation and divorce when you have children. Give and take, forgive and forget, move on in life, but don’t make your children suffer.
Almighty Allāh give the best understanding to all couples and make their married life happy and prosperous and keep them together till their last breath, Āmeen.
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جَزَاكَ اللَّهُ خَيْرًا
Request for Du’ās
وَالسَّلَامُ Hanif Dudhwala
Supplementary Resources
The Happy Marriage Seminar ; Q&A- Married Life Golden Advice ; The Path to a Successful Marriage – Shaykh Ḥasan ‘Alī Ṣāḥib
Some Common Problems in Marriage ; Understanding Conflicts in Marriage – Mufti Abdur Raḥmān ibn Yūsuf Ṣāḥib
Addressing Marriage Problems – Mufti Muḥammad ibn Ādam al-Kawthari Ṣāḥib
A Happy Home – Shaykh Zahīr Maḥmood Ṣāḥib
Ingredients For A Successful Marriage – Shaykh Aḥmed ‘Alī Ṣāḥib
Rights of the Wife ; Rights of the Husband ; Parents and Children ; Parents as Educators – Hanif Dudhwala